Eat, sleep, practise Chinese, repeat.

I forgot to mention in my last blog about my traumatic moped experience last weekend. Having just left the market, I was happily sat on the back of the moped eating my fried chicken when all of a sudden I heard an almighty whack. Then the pain hit me and I realised that my head had been hit by a security barrier. A huge, solid metal, security barrier. The security guard just sat there laughing at me! On the plus side, I managed to keep hold of my chicken throughout the incident.

This week, my lessons have mainly been the exam preparation lesson. I do still feel like somebody is going to come and demand to see my qualifications any minute because I swear I was in a lecture receiving this lesson myself, less than two years ago. Anyway, I think I’ve scared them enough so it’s been a successful week of teaching.

My students....

On Wednesday, I FINALLY got to venture to Hankou for fun. Obviously, everybody knows about overpopulation in China and so there is a novel way of solving this on the roads. There are three ways to get to Hankou; the 1^st or 2^nd bridge across the Yangzte river or the underground Shugohu tunnel. My friend Janet has a number plate ending in 8, therefore she cannot go along the underground tunnel on dates ending in 9 or 0 e.g. 10^th, 19^th. She can also not go across the 1^st bridge on even dates e.g. 2^nd, 4^th, 6^th. This way of driving would completely baffle me, I mean, can you imagine working out your route of driving and having to choose another way because of the number on your car registration?!

Anyway, we finally made it (legally) and ended up at this modern precinct full of small shops and restaurants. The food menu was in Mandarin but the cocktail menu had an English version! I had this fruity cocktail called a Bi Xian (don’t ask, I just saw the words Absolut and passion fruit), but it arrived with a spiky cucumber chilling in it. That definitely wasn’t stated on the menu! When we left, it was sleeting and freezing! We were right near the harbour in Hankou, therefore, practically experiencing a sea breeze alongside the sleet. That afternoon I had my heating on full in an attempt to thaw out slightly.

Cocktail bar / restaurant

My Bi Xian complete with cucumber!

Pumpkin soup

Fried noodles with cabbage and chicken with lotus and mushrooms

Spicy cauliflower and bacon

Pork ribs and twisty breadsticks

On Friday, I was meeting a friend for Starbucks but I had some time to kill after my class. I ended up going to Chicony, the John Lewis of Wuhan. This place has everything – cinema to karaoke, Pizza Hut to Haagen Daaz, cosmetics to clothes and EVEN a supermarket in the basement. I wandered to the supermarket and found some foreign food! I managed to get my favourite hot chocolate, cinnamon graham cereal and ear muffs. I can definitely make loads of meals with these ‘essentials’.

Swiss Miss hot chocolate!

One of the things I was missing from home was the Christmas drinks at Starbucks but THEY HAVE THEM IN CHINA! They are Chinese versions of the drinks, but the options of tiramisu latte, white chocolate and cranberry mocha or toffee nut latte in a red cup was very exciting. I ended up taking advantage of the free wifi and sat reading a book on my tablet for a good hour. It was also an excellent chance to people watch, especially how Chinese people behave in such a Western environment. My conclusion? They just don’t understand the concept of Starbucks, but it’s okay, more experience for me.

Friday turned into a mass food shopping day. Having already visited Chicony, I also went to the Arabic supermarket, my local supermarket and finally, the market. I find that living on my own means that I tend to leave food shopping until my fridge is left with some garlic cloves, Caesar dressing and a half-empty bottle of Sprite before I deem it a necessity to go food shopping. Luckily, I now have a nice, full fridge. I was supposed to go out Friday night, but after a filling meal of pork noodles, I ended up having an early night. This was the best decision I ever made because I woke up so refreshed on Saturday morning. I even managed to rustle up a BLM (bacon, lettuce, mayonnaise) before my crazy day began.

Christmas decorations at Huashi cultural street

Yesterday (Saturday) was a super busy day. It started at 12pm, where my friend Janet picked me up and I went to a training centre to do an extra lesson. Every couple of months, Chinese training centres pay native English speakers to moderate their work for a very good amount of money. So after a quick meal of pork dumplings, I had a two-hour time slot with some 9 and 10 year old children, on the topic of the past tense. It actually went fast and before I knew it, the time was 3pm. After teaching I went straight to Mr Mai’s and volunteered until 5pm at the kids club. It was so busy this week with at least 20 children but on arrival one little girl said to me, ‘Wow, you are so beautiful’. This was a very nice greeting! Volunteering finished and it was time to enjoy my evening!

Pork dumplings and pork baozi

Rooftop terrace view at the training centre

Even though the Lincoln Christmas market is always a disappointment, it still always makes me feel all Christmassy. So in true Ellis style, I decided to recreate attending the Christmas market by visiting the Jianghan Road night market in Hankou, with my friend Greg. This market was huge! Rows and rows of people selling everything you could ever imagine. I went to buy a watch and instead, came home with a leather rucksack, two lipsticks and a pair of fake Uggs. We also tried some different street food, including a sausage on a stick, spicy potatoes and a rice based pasta in sauce.  

Puppies for sale

Guy casually washing a whole, plucked chicken

Jianghan Pedestrian Street

Djing in the middle of the road with traffic being directed around him!

So happy with all my food! 

There were also puppies for sale and a random man DJing in the road whilst the police just casually directed traffic around him! The market itself was next to Jianghan Pedestrian street – the longest walking street in Wuhan – so I would like to come back to see more of that. On the way back home at the subway station, I saw a man selling a few watches and decided to take a quick look. This obviously fake Cartier watch ended up on my wrist and then he had the cheek to say it would cost over 1000RMB to buy. That’s over £100! A Cartier watch being sold by a man in a subway station is DEFINITELY not real.

To finish off my crazy day, I decided to go out with everyone at night. After grabbing some Tung Mian (vegetable noodles), I went to join everyone on a bar crawl. We went to Radio Rock, where after asking for a White Russian cocktail, I was presented with a tumbler only containing Kahlua, Vodka and Baileys. I had to practically beg for milk to save myself from the world’s strongest drink. Then it was time to go to Helen’s, another foreign bar that I haven’t yet visited. Finally, we got a cab to Prison and ended up in Vox, where one of the foreign teachers was Djing. Walking into Prison, I saw a ginger cat asleep on the bar. Well, I thought it would be a brilliant idea to pour my remaining sambuca over the cat. Cue sticky, intoxicated cat, which fell off the bar. Whoops! In Vox, I ended up talking to two German guys and whenever I have a drink, I do still think that my German is amazing. Luckily, I just about managed to pass off my German as acceptable and they seem very impressed.

Helen's bar...

Reggie my new friend

Vox!

So after my busy day yesterday, I plan to do very little today. I’m going to tidy round my apartment (is it just me or does anyone seem to become a tornado after a night out and throw things everywhere when they come home?) and then pamper myself. But first, I really, REALLY need food...homemade burger and wedges to the rescue!

A final thought – am I actually becoming Chinese now?

This week, I have realised how much I have adapted to living in a foreign country. Considering that before I came to China, my vocabulary stretched to Ni Hao (hello) and now I can order dinner, say how spicy I want it, ask for no green beans and that I want to take it away. I am also finally able to use Chinese toilets like a pro and FINALLY know my address in Chinese. The taxi drivers no longer look at me with a confused expression when I ask to go home.

The countdown to Christmas has officially begun!

This week has been one of two halves. At the beginning of the week, my students were really annoying me by well, being typical students! They kept turning up late so I took matters into my own hands and decided to start locking the door at the beginning of the lesson. With one class, which is supposed to have 45 students in only having 23 once my door locking method commenced, I hope it will result in a full house next week. Ellis 1: students 0.

Wednesday was a much better day because I had a proper pamper afternoon. Janet and I went to get our nails done and then ventured to Metro, the huge foreign supermarket on her side of the city. It was a very successful, if mostly alcoholic shop. I even managed to get proper bacon!! I was far too excited after two months without bacon sandwiches.

That evening, Dean and I took Brendan out for a pre-thanskgiving meal, although the food itself wasn’t very American. We had some of my favourite dishes including tofu noodles, crispy chicken and hot, spicy cabbage. We then carried on the ‘Thanksthrilling’ celebrations by watching the most random film ever – Predestination. My brain actually hurt from working out the plot and without my glasses, it was an interesting evening.

Thursday was Thanskgiving! As the majority of my friends in Wuhan are American, I am officially allowed to celebrate it this year. Sadly, it was just a normal day with teaching in the morning and tutoring the kids at night. One thing I have realised is that the Chinese really love substituting children and not thinking of telling me. This week, one child called Orange was poorly so they brought the devil child (which I swear I banned from my class a few weeks back) in as a replacement! I wasn’t overly impressed by his return so I insisted that his parents sit in to control him. It didn’t exactly work so I’m just praying that Orange returns soon!

I didn’t celebrate Thanksgiving until the Friday night, when I went to another teacher’s apartment for a house party. Everyone had to take some food and drink, and then we ended up having dance offs all evening. For the party, I made some Irish soda bread, which was amazing dipped in the turkey gravy! Dean and I didn’t end up leaving until 5am and then spent the next hour trying to flag a taxi in the pouring rain. 6am = bedtime after a long walk home and seeing people getting ready to open their shops and restaurants as we were ready to sleep. The noodle places were drying their noodles with fans, as apparently it is part of the process – very bizarre!

Thanksgiving buffet!

My irish soda bread

Olivi and his turkey

Poor Will!

And so the warm up begins

My face says it all

My favourite picture from the night

Dad dancing at it's finest

It was very difficult to get out of bed on Saturday morning after getting home so late. But I had my volunteering to go to at 2ish so I woke up and made a bacon sandwich which made me feel tons better and then traipsed in the pouring rain (why is foreign rain always so much heavier?) to Mr Mai’s. The kids club was good fun and I got to sit and do colouring and crosswords for a good couple of hours. I even coloured a picture of scarecrow to help influence the children’s creativity. I also had to take part in a few sing-a-long Christmas songs and then after the kids club finished, I kindly accepted a tuna sandwich and a rest. Children are so tiring! Saturday evening was very spontaneous and after Skyping my dad for his birthday, Dean and I ventured out into the pouring rain (again!) for dumplings with hot sauce and then watched the film, Lucy. Another bizarre film but it was a good plot. I definitely went to bed at 10pm as I was exhausted from the Thanksgiving party.

Today is Sunday and Christmas has come early to my apartment! I have spent the morning putting up my decorations that my mum sent me, whilst listening to Christmas carols. I am very excited to tuck into my advent calendar tomorrow! This afternoon, Dean and I went to Huquan market, which sells everything from clothes to accessories and shoes. I even saw some random pool tables which people were free to go and play on! I also got to try some amazing street food – spicy fried chicken and dumplings for the grand total of £1.20. I am going to have a shock when I go home to England and buy food.

Christmas cards and advent calendar!

Christmas tablecloth with my miniature tree!

Painstakingly handmade Christmas bunting (had to thread the letters for ages!)

Christmas paper chains!

Snowman!

This evening I have watched a Christmas film and cooked spaghetti bolgonese (I finally found beef mince!) and so tonight, I am going to relax before the madness of teaching starts again tomorrow. I am also hoping that the rain stops soon. All the Chinese are saying that it will last for ten days but I don’t think me or my umbrella can take much more Wuhan rain so fingers crossed for sunny weather soon.....

Ninja turtle cocktails are always a good idea.....

It’s Sunday and I am officially dead after a crazy weekend. The week itself was pretty quiet and I spent my free time getting all my lesson plans sorted for the rest of the semester. I also had to write the exam for my students, which feels very strange seeing as it’s only been a couple of years since I was taking exams at uni!

My tutoring on Thursday evening was really good fun. We were learning colours, but one child responded with ‘sit down’ for every single colour....am I really that bossy? I have also arranged with the parents to have a Christmas party for them and I am so excited! I haven’t played games like pass the parcel and musical chairs in years but I think my years of birthday party attendances at school will put me in good stead. These children aren’t ever going to want to go to a Chinese birthday party ever again.

Friday evening was spent volunteering at Mr Mai’s and I had some brilliant conversations with some guys about cockney rhyming slang. So when I left, I walked down the apples and pears (stairs!). At 9pm when I finished, I decided it would be an excellent idea to go and try out the bar right next door, which had a see through top floor! It was a very eventful evening. I was supposed to pre drink here and then go to see my friend DJ. Oh no, with a bar woman not bothering to measure the units and giving me a whisky tumbler full of tequila for a £1, I ended up going home very early. I did have some amazing drinks though, such as a ninja turtle! The night ended with me ordering some barbeque food in Chinese - what an expert.

Ninka turtle cocktail!

See through floor!

Chinese takeaway

On Saturday, I felt okay and went food shopping. In the afternoon, after a cheeky waffle and pink lemonade, I went to see Interstellar at the cinema which was incredible. Chinese cinemas have HUGE screens and the films are in English, which surprised me. However, during the film, the woman next to me had pretty much bought a whole picnic with her and she looked very pleased with herself when a WHOLE ROAST CHICKEN appeared. I will never understand why she spent the next three hours trying to carve the chicken with chopsticks.

Pink lemonade!

As I’d made Irish soda bread that morning, I took some over to Dean and it ended up with me agreeing to go back out again in the evening. We went down to Optics Valley and to an Irish bar called Captain Jacks. You can take your own food into bars in China so there was me and Olivi sat eating chicken and bacon wraps at midnight! We left the bar to check out a Chinese club called MOMO’s and were greeted by a red carpet. So far, so good. However, I think we were in the club for about thirty seconds because it was a Chinese woman wailing and overpriced drinks.

Onto plan B, five of us squeezed into a taxi and headed to Prison. This is where this Chinese boy was determined to keep buying me drinks, even though I didn’t want to drink. Cue Mel and I hiding behind a post as she had to keep drinking the sambuca he bought me. Nightmare! We all ended up going back to Dean’s for an after-party. I was the life and soul of the party and fell asleep as soon as I sat down. Brilliant.

Rocking the red carpet into MOMO

How many foreigners can we get into one taxi?

Cannot handle two nights in a row - I do look tanned though!

Cue Sunday morning or should I say afternoon and after waking up ridiculously late today, I ventured down to cultural festival. This festival is held at Wuhan University campus and different countries have food and souvenirs to buy. It was a refreshing change to try some other foods so I had a spicy chicken patty from Mali, jerk pork kebabs from Congo and some form of spring roll from Vietnam. We were also persuaded by some students to buy jelly, in order to have our picture taken with an Instagram board, which was hilarious. There we were, in the rain, posing with jelly!

Culture festival!

Buy a jelly, get a photo free

Arabic dancing

Yes there is a yurt

The arabic men warming up for the show...

Jerk pork kebabs from Congo!

This afternoon I have cooked a hearty meal because it’s cold and I miss English food. The apple crumble was the best thing ever! And this evening I have Skyped people from home, including my mum, sister and friends from uni! It’s so nice to see faces you know and miss. It’s my sister’s birthday tomorrow and I’m gutted that I can’t be there but I’m going to Skype her later on.

Night all

xxx